Writing my First Book
It was an odd thing, deciding I wanted to write a book. To be honest, it’s actually my brother’s fault that I got into writing. I don’t think he knows it. He’s not a reader . . . or so he says. It all started when he forced me to watch an anime called Attack on Titan. Maybe you’ve heard of it? Disclaimer: My brother is not an anime guy, and I’m not really an anime gal, or at least, I wasn’t. So, imagine my surprise when he insisted that this random show was one of the best stories ever written. I considered my curiosity peaked. We spent that winter binging the entire show, from the first episode to its heart wrenching conclusion. It moved me more than I’ve ever been moved in my entire life. It’s a perfect story! Full of monsters, battles, heartbreak, love, magic. It was all encompassed in the most innovative and beautiful anime. When the final season commenced, I was down a rabbit hole, watching interview after interview of AOT’s creator, Hajime Isayama. The interviews were great, but in reality, it wasn’t Isayama who inspired me — it was one of his fans.
Reading through the comment section, I stumbled upon a comment written by a passionate and optimistic AOT enthusiast. I don’t even remember exactly what the comment said, but I’ll never forget how it made me feel. In summary, the commenter said that they were so inspired by Isayama, that they wanted to write their own story. Let me tell you, they were PUMPED. The way this commenter made their declaration made me believe that they could do it. They were going to write the next great story! It was as passionate as Micheal Scott’s declaration of bankruptcy – and don’t get me started on the reply section! Everyone was so uncharacteristically supportive for a comment section! Dozens of people wished this commenter ‘good luck’ and told them not to give up. You could see the fire in their spirit through words on a screen, and I loved it. This random commenter will never know it, but I joined them that day. I started writing my own story.
I wrote a 300 page novel with as much passion and grit as I could muster, and it was garbage. Boring, pointless, plotless, stinky garbage that was badly written. So I rewrote it. I added characters, plot lines, villains, some of this, and some of that . . . and it was less stinky garbage, but now about 500 pages worth. Cool. I rewrote it again. It was better. Then I rewrote it again, and it was really good, but it still needed work. Eventually I cut the damn thing in half and called it, The Heretics: Mettalium Series Book 1. I’m still working on book 2. It's not done, but it's not garbage anymore, so there's that.
So, what’s my point? What’s the big lesson I learned while writing my first book? Well, first of all, I had to learn how to cope with the pain of being told that my writing was garbage. That hurts. It hurts a lot, but it also made me a better writer in the end. I also had to learn that the passion I felt when I read that silly comment was incredibly fleeting. In fact, most days I don’t feel that passion at all. It’s easy to make a bold declaration when the power of the moment compels you forward. It’s harder to sit down day after day, and do your best to turn a pile of garbage into a pile of treasure while knowing it may all be for a dream that might never come true.
I may never be a published author. It's entirely possible that no one will ever read my book(s?) besides friends and family members, who only begrudgingly read it because I’m holding a proverbial gun to their heads with crazy eyes and a cheshire grin.
“Did you like the book, mom?” Taleah asked, wild-eyed and mere inches from her poor mother’s face.
No matter what happens, I’m still glad I wrote it. I’m still grateful for the moments that I stumble on a passage thinking – goddamn . . . I wrote that? It’s good to be moved by my own writing, and no, it’s not arrogant. If your work doesn’t move you, how can you expect it to move someone else? Writing a book starts with you. Your ideas. Your imagination. Your efforts. You should fall in love with your writing and your story, because if you don’t love it nobody else will. Take pride in your work. Accept feedback. Put in the hours. Everything else will fall into place as soon as you get the right fortune cookie.
Written by: Taleah Graves